More hours, please

As if there weren't already too few hours in a day, Daylight Savings has to go and take another one away from me. I'm still all kerfuffled.

So my day today. It's 9:20 and I'm waiting for a load of laundry to dry so I can get in the shower. How is it that when the husband is gone, things seem to go more smoothly, but I still seem to have less time?

What I did today:
5:50 a.m. - Get up, get dressed, get kids up, get kids dressed, get everyone snacked, let dog out and in, do hair, grab stuff, get out the door.

6:20 - Leave the house, drive kids to school

7:00 - Drop kids off, hugs, kisses, leave for work

7:15 - Get to work, grade papers, teach teach teach, grade more papers, plan, copy, teach teach teach, power outage, teach, grade more papers, copy, read for planning

3:45 - Rush out the door to get the kids and drive home to pick up the video camera and let the dog out

4:45 - Pick up my mom, head to Boy's hip-hop class

5:00 - Record videos of Boy booty-shaking and head bobbing, entertain Baby Girl while Boy dances with stories and puzzles

6:00 - Pick up McDonald's on the way to Tae Kwon Do, eat (feeding Baby Girl one apple slice, then one chicken nugget at a time since she likes to play with her food and take FOREVER to eat it)

6:45 - Drop off Mom and Boy at Tae Kwon Do, run to Walgreens to drop off Mom's Redbox video and pick up some cough drops for her, laugh at Baby Girl as she refuses to follow me as I leave an aisle because she has to "find where this sippy goes!" (she's just as anal as her mommy), head back to Tae Kwon Do

7:00 - Get back to Tae Kwon Do, let Mom watch Baby Girl as I do some more reading for school, take Baby Girl to the potty, get coats on kids, gather everybody together to get back in the car

7:45 - Drop off Mom, get home, let dog out, brush teeth, get pajamas on, read Baby Girl stories, put Baby Girl in bed, have Boy read his book (he's reading to his class at some point this month and has to practice a story of his choice), have Boy practice his sight words flash cards, read Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets, put Boy in bed, kisses, tucks, close door, take a breath.

But wait, we're not done.

8:15 - Get load of laundry out of dryer, put load into dryer, put load into washer

8:30 - Start folding laundry, phone rings, talk to sister-in-law about crappy parental situation (while folding laundry), hang up the phone, try to watch Desperate Housewives while folding, get bored, turn off TV, put some laundry away

9:00 - Phone rings, tell Husband that I haven't even gotten in the shower yet and I've got laundry to do, hang up, do some more laundry, throw up my hands and say fuck it, sit down at computer and start reading my blogs and checking email (including work email)

9:20 - Finish an email to a parent, start blogging.

I'm still not done for the day. I've got more reading to do for work, more laundry to do, and a shower to take, all before 11 when I'll finally collapse into bed.

It's now 9:39. Tick tock. What did you do all day today?

Blurbs

Didn't sleep much last night. Hubby was gone. Snuggled with the puppy - not at all a decent substitute. Although she is very soft.

Kids were snots yesterday. Much better today. Did my good deed today by teaching the Boy about compassion for others. Girl sang "Wo wo" adorably wrong.

As if I don't have enough to do, I signed up for a book study for work. Now I'm blogging instead of reading. I should be in bed.

Hip hop class tomorrow. Can't decide when I want to call it quits when it comes to letting Boy experience all these activities and such. Since we joined the Y he fell in love with swimming and gymnastics, plus he does tae kwon do and hip hop now. He loves all of them. I guess we'll quit when it gets to be too much for me, Girl starts doing stuff, or Boy says he likes one or more better than the others. Right now he loves it all.

Bedtime. More tomorrow.

All by myself...

I wanna be...all by myself...

You love incorrectly-quoted Celine Dion songs, right? You're welcome.

Actually, the hubby left for a business trip today and I am by myself, except for the kids, the dog and my own angst. I can't decide what to do with myself. I'm getting over a cold so I could just be lazy all day, but the house is a mess so I should do some work. The kids want to take Maya to the dog park, but it's raining so we can't walk without getting soaked. I really would love to have some alone time, but I feel guilty every time I do that. I'd like to go shopping and do my leisurely, stare at everything as long as I want, relaxed kind of trip, but I can't do that with the kids (Baby Girl never stops chatting and Lex starts asking to move on from one area after about a minute). Lex wants to work on our choreography to Justin Bieber's Never Say Never. I can't come up with a good reason NOT to do that.

I'm thinking after that we'll all go out to the garage so they can watch High School Musical while I work out. At least I'll feel somewhat accomplished even if they're just being lazy. But what I really want to do is crawl back into bed and sleep for 10 hours.

Lex started hip hop class this past week. He adores it - the instructors are both guys who liked him immediately, and he's the youngest and the only boy. But man, can he freestyle. The kid is so confident in front of other people. It reminds me of me when I was his age - I loved to perform, dance, sing, spell (I won a couple of spelling bees) and I had a lot of confidence in front of people. Makes sense considering I'm a teacher now - teachers are nothing if not performers.

I went to the counselor about my parents' divorce yesterday. When I was done, after talking and bawling for an hour, I was exhausted. No earth-shattering revelations or anything, and really, nothing that I hadn't already figured out myself, but she was easy to talk to and it's probably good to have someone who gets paid to listen to me whine. Everyone else is getting pretty sick of me. :-)

Baby Girl just ran in and announced that she shared her pretzel with Big Brother because he asked nicely. I should go - pretzels and hip-hop choreography fun will ensue.

Busy busy busy

I'm exhausted.

Seriously. I mean, yeah, I get that there are a lot of people out there who have lives that are much more stressful than mine, with many more challenges than me (mainly because I taught many of their children) but still. I'm freaking TIRED.

This week has been ridiculous. Three days in a row I didn't get in the door until after 8 p.m., after leaving the house at 6:30 a.m. One of those days was a 12 hour day at work. After weeks like this I really like to have a lazy weekend in which I have the option to not get dressed or leave the house all weekend. However, today I had my mom's purse party, my friend's baby shower, and the husband's grandma's birthday dinner. Lots of fun and not at all mentally stimulating, right? I actually passed out on my in-laws' couch after dinner tonight and slept through my kids breakdancing right in front of me.

Anyway, life has been crazy. Maya graduated puppy class this week and we signed up for intermediate class in April. She's doing great - I haven't been as consistent as I'd like with her training but she's catching on pretty well. Intermediate class works mostly on distractions, which is her biggest challenge, so hopefully that will help. I'm determined that this dog will be our best dog ever, and dammit, I'm going to put in the work to get her that way.

The kids are amazing. Lex decided he wants to grow his hair out to look like Justin Bieber, so there's that. I decided not to fight it. The more you fight your kids on these things the more they'll fight back to get what they want. Pick your battles, I say. I also told him I'd take him to the Bieber movie. Secretly, there's a little part of me that wants to see it (if only to figure out what kind of crack this kid is selling to the 12 year old girls). I think Lex just wants to learn more hip-hop moves.

He also got his report card a few weeks back and blew me away. The grading system is standards-based now, with 1-2-3-4 grades, 4 being above grade level. He went from mostly 2s in second quarter to all 3s this quarter, with six 4s in some basic concepts (knowing letters, recognizing his name, colors, etc.). He had a major maturity growth spurt in the last few months and he is just such an amazing little man. I'm so proud of him and the person he's becoming - he's so kind, helpful, caring and lovable. And responsible too - he reminds me of things that I'm constantly forgetting. Such a good kid.

The Baby Girl is hitting a growth spurt - she basically skipped size 4t clothes and I now have to buy 5t if I want anything to last the month. She's not even 3 yet. She's totally proportional but has always been at the 75th percentile, so she'll probably be at least my height if not taller. We're getting ready to sign her up for tae kwon do soon, and I'll probably have her take dance classes at the YMCA since she ADORES dancing (she wants to be just like her idol, big brother). I want her to explore other dance classes besides ballet though - too many body image issues come up with ballet.

As for her personality, her teacher told me the other day that she has a very "sweet spirit." She had been telling me about how one of the other kids had thrown a small tantrum but that Baby Girl never did that - she was always so well behaved, sweet and helpful. I'm so lucky to have such wonderful kids who care so much for each other (and other people in general). Lately I've been pretty down about my parents' divorce and she came up to me the other day, out of the blue, and asked, "Are you feeling all right, Mommy?" Then she gave me a hug and said, "You feeling better now." I definitely was. :-)

I fall in love with teaching more every day now. I adore my kids this year, they're all such smartasses and they make me laugh constantly. I'm learning new things - both in the curriculum I'm teaching and the classes I'm taking through the district professional development. I have an incredible teaching partner who is so full of resources that she's probably saved me about 5,000 hours of work in my first year here. It was truly the best decision of my life to leave my previous building, especially after the stories I'm hearing from my friends who still work there. It's wonderful to love what I do again.

That's pretty much it at this point. Life is busy but I get to spend it doing things I love with people I love (like my bestie, when we go for a walk at the waterfront tomorrow morning!). I'm trying not to dwell on my parents' struggles and focus on all the good in my life right now. Because there is a lot of it.

Music to her ears

I love writing, and I love talking about myself, so why do I find it so hard to update my damn blog regularly?

My wonderful son (we'll call him Lex, I like Superman-themed names) is frickin' READING. I've been working with him using BOB books and some phonics books and various other educational tools that I'm lucky to have access to because I'm a teacher. We've been learning letters and sounds and phonemes and digraphs and whatever the hell else you're supposed to teach beginning readers (can you tell I'm not a literacy specialist?). I've been working with Lex for two years on the actual reading thing. Before that it was letter-sound recognition and the stuff they have to know before they can start putting sounds together, but it wasn't until we started the BOB books that he started taking off. However, this year I really took a step back because he kept saying he didn't want to read at home. I took that to mean, "Mom, you're pushing too hard, back the fuck off." Despite the fact that every teacher (and perfectionist gifted student) bone in my body wanted so badly to keep working on it - because dammit, I KNEW he could do better - I also knew that making it an ordeal was not a great recipe for a love of reading.

So I told the hubby that it was his job now. Every night since then, Hubs has read Harry Potter to the kids and occasionally had Lex read a BOB book or two back to him, maybe once a week or so. Tonight, he put the kids on our bed and handed Lex the book "The Frog Prince Continued." Lex proceeded to sound out the first ten pages of the book. He got stuck on a couple of words but managed "happiness" and "princess" all on his own. It was truly magical. The way their little brains work as they begin to figure out how all those letters go together, and then get so excited about it as they realize they can do it - that's incredible.

I did sit down with Lex the other night to have him read me a BOB book and a phonics book. After he read the first two pages pretty fast I said, "YAY! I'm so excited - you're actually READING!" Lex responds,"You used to scream and clap your hands when I finished." I asked, "Do you want me to do that?" Lex: (giggle) "YES!"

I think I deafened the dog that night.

I ADORE my dog.

Maya has been an absolute dream. We picked her up from the airport the night before Thanksgiving and she has been everything that I hoped she would be. She was potty-trained, crate-trained, and knows a command or two. But in addition to that, she is snuggly, relaxed, sweet, lovable, and sooo soft and silky.

She bounds around like a bunny and hops like Tigger. She walks like a dream on the leash - even my two-year-old can walk her. I can take her anywhere with us (and I usually do). She listens to us and only gums things that are lying on the floor. She doesn't eat much and will always be lean and skinny. She also reminds me, in so many little ways, of my Lacey. Lacey was the dog that I used to say looked like a longhaired whippet, and missing her was what caused me to google the breed. Lacey had her faults, but overall, she was my little princess, and Maya, while not replacing her by any means, has certainly done well in her place.

I can't stop recommending this breed to everyone. No one has ever heard of it - I get a lot of "Longhaired whippet? I didn't know they came in longhair," and "She's so beautiful, does she have whippet in her?" Everyone adores her, pets and people alike, and at the dog park she is always making friends with the humans, leaning up against them and licking their hands, asking to be petted.

As I was standing in the shower tonight, having brought her in to the bathroom with me so she didn't get into anything, I started making low "awroo?" doggie noises just to see her cock her head in that quizzical way that is always so cute. She started whining back and making similar noises. As I was contemplating the fact that I was actually talking to my dog, it suddenly occurred to me that we actually have a new family member. The kids adore her, the husband is actually showing signs of liking her, and I've fallen completely in love with her. I've bonded with her in a way that I never did with Max, and whether that's because she reminds me so much of Lacey or because she just fits perfectly with our family and our lifestyle, I have no idea. All I know is, this dog, this breed, is perfect, and I'm so glad I decided to adopt this baby.


For more information on longhaired whippets, and links to her breeder and original owner:
International Longhaired Whippet Club
Aurai Sighthounds (Maya's breeder)
Tova Sighthounds (Maya's mother's original owner)

Basking

So, my son. My son is awesome. He's a super sweet kid with a heart of platinum and is just an amazing kind of person. I don't know what we did right, but that kid is making us look good right about now.

I'm not saying he's always been that way - no, there were times (many, in fact) when my husband and I would just as soon have thrown him out the window as hugged him. (Granted, our windows are three feet off the ground, but still.)

In truth, many of those times were my overreactions to behavior that, let's face it, was perfectly normal for a preschooler. I was depressed, after all, and life was hard to deal with. Add in an extremely stubborn and strong-willed, bright young boy who delighted in pushing buttons and it was a recipe for some screaming and throwing of things. And that wasn't all him.

However, since I got treated and, in part, since he started kindergarten, all of the difficult behaviors and dragging feet and fighting back have completely disappeared. Somehow, my son turned into the angel I always knew was under there, and he shows it to us every single day. When I wake up in the morning, I find that my children are sitting at the kitchen table, with a complete breakfast in front of them - cereal, fruit, glass of milk - and neither my husband nor I fixed it for them. When my daughter wakes up, he immediately runs to her, helps her onto the potty and helps her wipe her butt (now that's love). He is an amazing teacher and problem solver. When my kids get into the (very rare) argument, it's usually because his little sister took something or is sitting in his spot. He'll tell me what she did, I'll tell him to work with her to solve the problem, and almost without fail they work together to fix it.

I mentioned to a friend yesterday that I got the kids that I needed to be the best parent I could be. Yes, I'm lucky - very lucky to have the kids I have, even moreso to have kids who are so helpful, well-behaved and kind and compassionate to each other. I'd like to take credit for it, and in some ways I have definitely encouraged certain behaviors, but after all that my son went through when I was unmedicated, I'm lucky. And he's lucky that I can now be a better mom to him and his sister.

This fall has been my healing season. My son has helped me heal. I look at him and see the kind of person I hope to be. Now - if I could just keep him from eating me out of house and home. :-)